When the weight of a broken relationship shatters your self-worth, where do you find the strength to piece it all back together? My courageous client's voyage to rediscover her value after enduring heartache is at the heart of our latest episode, offering a beacon of hope to anyone facing similar struggles. We delve into her remarkable journey, as she reflects on the lessons learned and the steps she took towards empowerment and self-love. With coaching as her compass, she navigated through the debris of the past and emerged with a newfound sense of peace and a redefined understanding of love, setting a powerful example for all who listen.
Our conversation takes an intimate turn as we uncover the transformative breakthroughs essential to healing the deepest of emotional scars. Our guest candidly shares her transition from a place of self-criticism to a life where she stands firmly in control. We discuss the impact of the 'mother wound' and tackle the lingering echoes of childhood trauma, shedding light on their influence over adult relationships. Revealing potent strategies like 'cutting the cords' and the cathartic act of writing forgiveness letters, this episode illustrates the profound changes that one can achieve with the right guidance and personal dedication. If you're ready to chart a course towards emotional liberation and life success, this journey will surely resonate with you.
When the weight of a broken relationship shatters your self-worth, where do you find the strength to piece it all back together? My courageous client's voyage to rediscover her value after enduring heartache is at the heart of our latest episode, offering a beacon of hope to anyone facing similar struggles. We delve into her remarkable journey, as she reflects on the lessons learned and the steps she took towards empowerment and self-love. With coaching as her compass, she navigated through the debris of the past and emerged with a newfound sense of peace and a redefined understanding of love, setting a powerful example for all who listen.
Our conversation takes an intimate turn as we uncover the transformative breakthroughs essential to healing the deepest of emotional scars. Our guest candidly shares her transition from a place of self-criticism to a life where she stands firmly in control. We discuss the impact of the 'mother wound' and tackle the lingering echoes of childhood trauma, shedding light on their influence over adult relationships. Revealing potent strategies like 'cutting the cords' and the cathartic act of writing forgiveness letters, this episode illustrates the profound changes that one can achieve with the right guidance and personal dedication. If you're ready to chart a course towards emotional liberation and life success, this journey will surely resonate with you.
Did I give it away? Or was it a persuasion? You all in my space, I, I owe it. I don't care what you say. I'm loving it this way. I'm hoping that you stay. I, I owe it. It's only you, it's only you. It's only you. I love you.
Speaker 2:
I'm loving you. It's only you. Hey, welcome back to the self-made and single podcast. I'm your host, rachel rose. So today we're gonna have yet another client spotlight with my wonderful client here who's had the most. I I mean. I know she's gonna be very humble and say oh, my transformation, you know, wasn't that big, but definitely from the day I met her to where she is now, she is really a different person and I'm so proud of her progress. So this is all about celebrating her today. So welcome, please introduce yourself and let us know what type of coaching that you had okay, hi everyone.
Speaker 1:
Um, I've started to have coaching sessions with Rachel um some months ago. Um, I started having private sessions with Rachel because, at the time, I was struggling in the relationship department, um, my self-esteem was very low and um I just didn't, you know, see myself worth and I wanted to build up my confidence and um. So, yes, that's the reason why I approached Rachel, because I needed some help and support in that department.
Speaker 2:
Cool, yeah, no, I know. Um, I remember when we first met, there was loads going on, wasn't there, and like the energy was just. It just felt like maybe, or as I perceived it, love was something that you were really trying to learn in a new way yes, yes, I think my issue at the time was that I was in a relationship for almost 30 years.
Speaker 1:
Um, I've got a 21 year old daughter and I was in that relationship for almost 30 years, and so that um came to an end um about a year, just over a year and a half ago, and so, um, I did meet someone straight away after that, but it was a very toxic um relationship and I wanted something real, something that's going to be long term. I didn't want, you know, um something that's going to be short term or some sort of fling, so I wanted that support or that guidance of how to actually achieve that.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah and yeah, I remember that time actually, and we've worked through so many different things, so can you talk to us some about some of the things that working together has helped you move through, whilst dealing with not only the breakup of your longest relationship but also the most recent one as well?
Speaker 1:
yeah, I think working with you has helped me to see my self-worth and I was actually built up my self-esteem quite a lot, um. I guess prior to the um, the ending of my original relationship, my long-term relationship, I was a confident, um, bubbly person. I know my self-worth, um, but when that came to an end and I kind of like got involved in a toxic relationship, that kind of like saw my self-esteem took a massive tumble and I didn't have the confidence I had and so, yes, doing this coaching session with you has actually helped quite a lot to actually build up my confidence. Now I'm more happier now I'm at peace, now I remember who I am and I'm more confident in myself yeah and oh, my gosh guys, if you saw today she's just glowing with her mac lipstick.
Speaker 2:
You know you're looking so happy and, yeah, I'm more confident in myself. Yeah and oh, my gosh guys, if you saw today she's just glowing with her Mac lipstick. You know you're looking so happy and, yeah, I'm just so proud of all of the different shifts you've made. Um, but I would love for you to tell us, like, what got you to the point where you said, okay, I do need some extra guidance, like I've been doing this on my own for a while and now I really want to make a change.
Speaker 1:
I want things to work differently for me yes, I think what happened is that um got me to the point of actually reaching out to you was that I found myself feeling very low. Um, I was crying quite a lot. I felt, um, like unloved. I didn't feel loved or appreciated, and I feel like I'm actually going down a slippery slope where I'm actually accepting anything and I'm actually kind of, in a way, emotionally abusing myself, and I thought my family and friends were seeing that they were trying to help me in as much way as they can.
Speaker 1:
I tried to get counseling, try to start doing my exercises and eating right and try to distract myself with things, but, um, nothing was working and so I just needed something. So I know that you know with yourself, you need to work on yourself. So sometimes you know you might need to spend a little to actually achieve your goals, but I thought it's worth it. You need to be in a emotionally stable place, and so I thought I have a 21 year old daughter, as I've mentioned before, and she saw the struggles I was going through and I know how it was affecting her as well. It wasn't just affecting me, it was affecting my daughter and my family and my work, and so, yes, I needed to actually break that chain and so I thought um, I heard about you. I think I went to some sort of session, yeah, live session yes, ecology of dating down exactly right.
Speaker 1:
That's what it was, and I and I heard you and when you were speaking, I could have you know, I could have felt your energy and I thought this is the person who's going to actually help me to regain my confidence and to help me to go back to where I know I can be and where I've been. I've been before and so, yes, it was a very good choice I made and I'm happy. I made that.
Speaker 2:
Oh, I, honestly it was such a pleasure having you and starting with you I felt like we were soul aligned. There was just so much, even from our backgrounds, that I felt, when we worked together, really fused well and, you know, really helped you along your way.
Speaker 1:
But you know, like I said, you've made so, oh my God, so many different breakthroughs and I would love to hear what are some of your biggest takeaways or Okay, I think my biggest breakthrough I think you mentioned the mother wound and that's resonated with me because I know I've had, I guess, maybe trauma from childhood trauma, and I felt like I was bringing that over into my relationships. I was getting, you know, extremely clingy to individuals and finding it difficult to let go because of my, I guess, maybe relationship with my daughter, and so when you mentioned that and explained to me more about that, that was a breakthrough to say, yes, this is what's happening, this is the reason why I am the way I am and, of course, I need to change that. So, yes, that's one of the main breakthroughs I had and I think you meant you asked me to. So, yes, that's one of the main breakthroughs I had and I think you meant you asked me to. What's it called?
Speaker 2:
again. Oh my gosh, what's it called, is it?
Speaker 1:
breaking cords. Cutting the cords yes, that was amazing. I think the first time I tried it, I could see that the person I was trying to cut the cord with that's when they're actually starting to move towards me, and so that that was a breakthrough. Yes, and even now I still try to continue to do that as much as I possibly can.
Speaker 2:
Amazing. Yeah, that will happen. It's crazy, isn't it Like? Maybe this is the same type of person who won't remember a birthday, but they will feel that you're trying to get away, and it's like yes, what's going on?
Speaker 1:
let me call her yeah, that's so good.
Speaker 2:
No, I'm really happy. And so you know, when you're doing the cutting cords exercise, like, is that's just the meditations that we're talking about, or are you doing anything else?
Speaker 1:
yes, the meditations. I also did the um, uh, forgive this letter as well, which was very powerful for me. Um, I guess when you write things down, that's when it's actually registering your brain what's what's taking place, what you're thinking, and so when I did that, that was very powerful for me and actually burning, it was kind of me letting go and stop feeling me forgiving myself, because I was kind of like feeling like I am actually emotionally abusing myself because I kept on going back into a toxic situation, actually emotionally abusing myself because I kept on going back into a toxic situation, and yet by me doing this, it helped me to forgive myself and to be able to say you know, you do make mistakes in life, but then you know you just need to let go of it and move forward.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, no, and I think you know, with the forgiveness that it just teaches you that it's okay as well, you know, like it's almost a forgiveness for yourself, like you know it's okay that this happened and and also to let them go as well, you know, to cut that tie in so there's no tension, you're not holding on to that energy. So, oh, so good, so good, and so I know, um, we focused on love. You know that's like the main focus of the coaching sessions. But what other areas do you feel like the private coaching helped you with?
Speaker 1:
So I think the private coaching has helped me to, as I said, regain my confidence. So, because of all the turmoil I was going through in toxic relationship, it was affecting my work and my progression. But now, because I've actually regained my confidence, I was able to go for an interview and feel more confident in myself and secure a permanent position. Yes, and now I feel more ready and more confident to move on. Of course, I've mentioned to you before well, I'm trying to buy my flat. This was something I was maybe being cautious about in the past, but now I need to kind of concentrate on me, build myself up and achieve my goals, and so I'm very close to achieving that goal.
Speaker 2:
So good, so, so, so good and yeah, like I said before, like you look so radiant and just so centered and grounded, I think the most that ever I've seen you. So, yeah, really, really proud of you and everything that you've done and and just your dedication, because it hasn't been linear, right, like it hasn't been this, like you know, um, session one, session two, and we're just it's happy days, right, it's been up and down, so what's really kept you dedicated to this journey?
Speaker 1:
because there have been sessions that have been harder than others yeah, I guess what kept me dedicated is because, um, I know where I've been in the past. I know I love my peace, I love to be happy, I love love, and so, because I want to achieve that, I wanted to achieve that so much. I wanted to be like a place where I'm happy and I feel loved, and you know, my confidence was better. That kept me dedicated, because I needed to get back there. I hated the person I was when I'm not happy, when my family and friends seen me crying or seen me unhappy and seen me sad. I wanted to get to a place back where I am at peace and where my family can see me shine, and so I was determined. I didn't want to stay where I was always stressed and depressed. I wanted to get back to that place, and so that kept me going so good. So, yes, my peace of mind, my happiness, is very important, and so I needed to keep working out of that.
Speaker 2:
Yes, for sure, and you know, as you've seen already, those are the things that are really going to carry you to achieve these huge milestones like buying a house and, you know, breaking through this interview and getting the job you want. It's got to come from within. So you've cracked that and I think you're just going to continue to just continue to heal, continue to get rid of any layers that don't serve you anymore and, yeah, really achieve all the goals that you have. Just so exciting to watch, um. So I wanted to ask as well so, what are what's your vision now when it comes to love, like how? What are your plans when it comes to love like? What do you want to magnetize in the future?
Speaker 1:
that's different from before yes, I think, um, when I started the coaching session with you, um, I was um scared to to try again because, um, I've been hurt so much that, um, I kind of like wanted to guard my heart. Um, I felt like there was not no genuine man out there to be honest, and like every all the men out there is actually just trying to hurt you, um. But now I see things different. You know there is someone. Of course, you just need to meet the right person, you need to get the right energy and, um, you need to just make sure that you have your non-negotiables and not settle and I guess that's my biggest thing. I need to just not settle, um, because that right person's out there for me yes, 100%.
Speaker 2:
And so interesting that you said this because I had this conversation with a friend yesterday and, like you know, settling there's um, it's funny because we're talking about the dating psychology of dating down. So yes, in the obvious sense, but of not settling for someone who could potentially be harmful, but also allowing things that you find sexy, you find fun and you know, not settling for someone who's a boring, safe person, exactly yeah, just because you think that's it. Oh, it's, you know, I know it's safe go wrong, yeah, yes, it's safe.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, I think that's what I did for so many years. That's the reason why I was in a relationship for so many years, because I thought, yes, this person is safe, um, financially I'd be fine, um, this person's not going to really be going away and leave me, um. But then, yes, you realize that's that's more to life than that. You're gonna be settling and you're not gonna be happy either. So you need to find the ideal person that's gonna match with you exactly and honestly.
Speaker 2:
I remember saying with another client, like women for so many years and just been looking at our list and we're like I'm gonna do without that and I would just love to be a fly on the wall and in a room for full of men and see how many men do that like they.
Speaker 1:
Just that I know I want the whole list but what I realize as well, you know, even though we do want a relationship, it's okay to be on your own for a while, just to enjoy your own company, to get to know yourself and have fun with yourself and your family and your friends.
Speaker 2:
So yes, yeah, yeah, I second that and I think grounding yourself in who you are, in your solitude, is going to help you walk away from people who aren't really a fit good for you. Yeah, yeah, like well, I'm good on my own, so bye. Yes, so what would you say to so many women listening because there's so many women across the world it's crazy who listen to podcasts. What would you say to them if they're really on the fence about investing and doing a private coaching and really making a change when it comes to relationships in their lives?
Speaker 1:
I would say to them um, as I said before, you know, your happiness, your peace of mind, your self-esteem is one of the most important thing and I think you know a private coach with you will help to build that up in the first place. Once you're happy with yourself, you're at peace with yourself, it would kind of like radiate to the world, and so that will help you to attract the person you're looking for. So I would say, definitely invest in yourself. You know you need to make time for yourself. So if it needs to take some time out of your your daily schedule or your weekly schedule to have your private coach to dedicate that to yourself, to improve yourself, you should definitely do that. It's worth it, yeah oh, so good.
Speaker 2:
Thank you so so much. I just love how honest and transparent you were. I'm sure people are going to love this episode, and so we will leave it there, guys. Thank you again for listening. As she said, like, if you're on the fence, just book yourself a soulmate strategy call. The link is always in the show notes. Have a chat with me. You know. My client here has already had one of those as well. Sign up for a soulmate strategy call to get clarity on what it is that you want to focus on and see how we can move forward and work together.
Speaker 1:
So all right see you later, thank you, thank you, take care, okay, bye, thank you you.